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01/04/2005: "Angel Food"
The Anaheim Angels have announced a plan to change their name to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, the early contender for dumbest thing I've heard in 2005.
First of all, this sets up a very silly name for the team in Spanish. They'll be Los Angeles de Los Angeles de Anaheim. For a team with a Mexican owner and a large Spanish-speaking fan base, you'd think they'd have thought of that.
They can also abbreviate their name as the LAAA's. The L Triple-A's. Perhaps their Triple-A team can be the Xtreme Xylophones of Xanadu. Minor league teams come up with crazy names all the time. Which, of course, would bring our old friend Kazuhito Tadano into the fold. The Angels would have to immediately acquire him and send him to the minors. I can see the line in the paper now: "...the L Triple A's also acquired Kazuhito Tadano and sent him to Triple-A Triple-X."
What happens when they follow the lead of the San Diego Padres and take on a corporate sponsor? They could be the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, Presented by Danny Ozark Grilling Systems. That's right, the LAAAPDOGS.
Actually, Danny Ozark would fit the situation perfectly. He had what still ranks as my favorite quote of all time: "Even Napoleon had his Watergate."
And even the Angels have their Angel Stadium of Anaheim. That's Angel Stadium of Anaheim, Home of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.
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